I made my way to the Gulp. The Gulp was a sick festering Mud-hole where the despising mucus lay. In this disgusting mess of strange puss. Evolved the god awful Mud Puppy. "The offspring of Satan himself" quoted the local people. The Mud Puppy is a strange breed, It's like a slug but not as nice and about the size of a small cat. As I examined this discharge of Satan. I realized they were Horrid. They seemed to thrive off spitting a Acidic-Saliva at the neighbor wildlife. There bullies I thought "I must clean these mud Puppies" By clean I mean make suffer! But I would need friends. So I looked for any kind of Social beings in the forest I couldn't go to the Zeekchee because they would kill me on sight. I had beaten one of there prized models. Zeekchee are proud charismatic birds. I don't why there considered a bird, they look more like a fish. Wait? They are! Ohhh.. It's probably the Theta Bark I ate. I say odd things when I smoke Theta Bark. Thats the one thing I like about the Mud Puppies the hawk there acidic-saliva on a special plant called "Nossic Tree" It's a Bonzai tree it stands about seven inches off the ground when fully matured. After the mud Puppies have spit there bile saliva it changes the plant to a "Azika bush" Azika bushes are rich in "Theta" Theta is Mild Hallucinogenic When smoked..But when eaten is a euphoric sedative. Anyway what am I talking about I shan't kill off these rare mud puppies because I am clearly addicted to there Theta bark! I will then gather as much Theta as I can and sell it to the closest town. I cannot plant any of these Azika Bushes because only mud puppies can cultivate the plant. But I could make a fortune off this theta bark! I would eventually be hated by the Mud puppies. But i don't need them as an ally. I must make many contacts out side this forest. TOO BE CONTINUED

Written By Calvin Meeds

Hehe

He's Cute :)

Baby Baggins was the MVP in Scuttle Destroyer 3. The Game Scuttle Destroyer 3 was a Hack and Slash MMO. The reason this game was so popular is because you start off as a small Nomad and go town to town slaughtering not only women and children but there animals too. This game was highly detailed and Fucking' hard. It was classified as a Button Masher. Many of nerds know what speak of, But for you n00bs I will explain. Button Masher's are games that require vast combo's in order to eliminate Boss's in the game. The Boss's were usually difficult and there AI (Artificial Intelligence) Was Absurd! The Boss's in the game knew if they could take a rock and throw at you before you got to them. If in fact it did hit you you usually wouldn't get to them. So the Boss's were intelligent. Anyway Baby Baggins was one Button Mashing Son of a Bitch. He had a Scuttle Buttle. Scuttle Buttle's are friends you can allow to be in your group. Once in your group you have XP share and Drug dealing abilities. Baby Baggins was quite the drug dealer in Scuttle Destoyer 3. Baby Baggins Made it to Mount. Oloc. There he found a worthy opponent The Beast Butcher. The Beast Butcher was a disgusting foul beast that would kill any animal and sell the meat to the village of Gothel. Baby Baggins hated Grohel. Baby Baggins realized if he killed the Beast Butcher, Grothel wouldn't get any food therefore he could take over Grothel. Grothel was full of n00bs anyway. So he came up with a plan to kill the Beast butcher. He ventured to the forest of Innocuous. There he gathered many Spolts. "Spolts: A poisonous berry, if consumed will result in immediate death." Baby Baggins headed back to Mount Oloc. Baby baggins hid in the shadows waiting patiently for the Beast Butcher to find a meal. The Beast Butcher Finally killed a small Otis Lyle and carried it back to his nest. Baby Baggins Quickly through all the spolts into the Otis Lyle. Beast Butcher Ate all of the Otis lyle! Once Beast Butcher had his fill, Baby baggins Jumped out of the Shadows and Threw his Gypsum Hammer over his shoulder and Swung the Heavy Mace into Beast's chest! Beast Butcher fell to his knees and let out a piercing Screech! Baby Baggins Swung the Over sized hammed directly into this foul creatures chest once again! Baby Baggins knew it was overkill but this creature powerful and he'd rather be safe then sorry..Baby Baggins waited a good couple weeks for the village of Grothel to starve. Then him and his Cuttle Buttle layed siege upon the n00bish town they captured it in no time the village was low in morale and food. This was a Key village for baby baggins! He reigned at Grothel for many years.

Written By Calvin Meeds

I like to play WoW and upload keyloggers to random users on the P2P network and collect Passins...Passins are user names and passwords collected on the blizzard servers...I then login or (Hack) the unsuspecting player or character of the WoW server by logging in the server with the collected Passins in my Keylogger Cache...I then Sell all expensive items...Or Hoard the rare merchandise to a area or (specific) Character...I then can create a badass or how you say...Idk

I just made all this up cuz I'm completely out of it and tired and I felt like writing something retarded...lololol

I had just gotten done buying some Shrooms from Fargo. Fargo told me these words "man this shit will fuck you up, don't you wanna get yo grunt on?". I asked Fargo "Umm what does grunt mean" He rambled on and on about the most random of subjects I don't recall much of what he said because of his Ghetto Slander. But while he was in the midst of describing what I thought was an oily whale or something of that nature I decided to devour the Shrooms Fargo had sold me. I just assume find out what "Gettin' my grunt on" was all about. 10 or 15 minutes past by.. and Fargos Ghetto slander was soon making sense. But I didn't want to listen! I had grown tired of his ambient echoes. I picked up a hammer laying on the ground next to his foot and slammed the heavy end directly into Fargos face! He didn't make any more noise I was amazed at how a small hammer could shut up a dangerous drug lord. I then thought to myself I live in the suburbs, what if i lived in the ghetto? I sat in a pool of my own urine for a good hour and a half. Coming to I realized what I had just done. And I was probably wanted for murder. I went home and changed my pants which were soaked in a concentrate of piss. I hadn't drank a lot of liquids so It reeked. My girlfriend was home so she would know I had been up to no good. So i would have to get by her. So looked around the room to find anything to get me out of trouble seeing a knife laying on the counter. I snatched it up fast and charged in at my girlfriend she seemed happy to see me that is before I rammed the sharp metal piece into her chest. I came to again and realized now done for. I cursed Fargo for all the pain he had caused.....

Written By Calvin Meeds

The rare and elusive CumberSnatch...
hahahahah

:)

i kid i kid

I was called into the crime scene to speak with the mother of the suspected criminal...I talked to her..She talked as if her child was nothing but perfect...But she was hiding something...It all seemed strange...the stench of Dementia an Corruption hung in the air, Like a rotted carcass on the side of rural highway...I was polite and well mannered...But if I were to find out that She had anything to do with this I would take a bat to her...After interrogating that bitch of a mother I kindly asked "may I go to your sons room?" She agreed...Even though i wanted to grab her and smash her head into the cheap painting on the wall...I slowly crept up the stairs to the Criminal's room...Once i got there I knew who ever lived in this room was definitely a weird mother fucker...I saw that the creep living in this room had a pet a rat...It looked happy but i could see that it was in grave danger...Because there was no food or water in his cage...I then grabbed the laptop..It was a nice laptop but I was a computer whiz if there was any form or sign that this guy was dangerous...i would be able to tell by the encrypted cookies and bookmarks in his internet explorer cache...Once I had logged in this nasty fuckers laptop.. I noticed he had visited many Q/A blogs he would post something like.."If I want to become a porn star how big does my penis have to be" There were countless of these..."Is 5 1/2 inches big"..It's obvious he has low self esteem and sever depression...Which brings me to to conclusion that he fits the profile and has a motive..I raced down stairs and leaped towards the mother (she was confused) I grabbed her by her hair and swung her with all my might...She didn't weigh but a measly 90 pounds so she..Sored through the air crashing into the side of the wall..She was obviously in a lot of pain...I chuckled at the site of her moaning like a little bitch...I had easily broken her arm and leg and she was probably going into convulsions, She wasn't in too good of shape anyway...I left feeling a little better Because i hurt the mother of the criminal..I had no intention of having any one informed that she will probably die..I just can't wait till that weird fucker come home to his mothers decaying corpse...Hopefully she'll still be alive just in a great deal of pain...I new by the crime scene that he wouldn't head home for quite some time...So time is on my side...I just can't wait to hurt him..Until time comes...I'll be patiently waiting...

Written By Calvin Meeds

On a dark, cold, wet night like tonight a Strange man stumbled in the Summit...The Summit was a bar full of Sadistic shady characters..Many of which were on the Sex offender website..The man of which I speak was not...His name was Cassidy...Cassidy frowned upon these Pederass scum...Cassidy was a tall, heavy, and mean mother fucker..He had a few drinks of the beer on tap...He had no intention of paying the tab...He wiped the beer from his grayed bushy beard and examined the bartender..the bartender was tall and had a misshapen head, he reeked of cheap cologne...obviously he was trying to cover up that he hadn't showered in weeks...Cassidy grabbed the bartender by the throat and said "Does this shit hole bar have a restroom..? Or should I just shit on the bar!?" the bartender nudged to the general direction of the shitter..Cassidy threw the light awkward man into the bar..making quite a scene...catching the attention of most of the bar!..Cassidy laughed.. then made his way toward the shitter...but a group of defiled fucks clustered in his path way...Cassidy grabbed the closest thing to a weapon...A chair..He then heaved the rotted stool at the Sad excuse of a gang...It pegged each and every one of them...See usually pedefiles are small cowards...So Cassidy had no problem Beating each and every corroded fiend in this demonic shack..He dragged the bartender out back and continued to beat him..Idk why but Cassidy had it out for that bartender...The Bartender was pummeled to a bloody mess of meat and jawbone fragments...Cassidy's fist was a mangled mess of The bartender face...I couldn't make out if it was the bartender's face or Cassidy's bloody nub...I'm sure it was a mixture of both...

By Calvin Meeds